Wednesday, October 5, 2016

KING VULTURE'S SOUND ATTACK; THE RAMONES AND HORROR

What do you know about The Ramones? I mean really? How deep does your knowledge go, how many albums do you own, what are your favorite deep cuts? I can't imagine anyone not, at the very least, owning a best of or the first couple of albums. To the uninitiated or casual fan, the assumption is that The Ramones made one great album and kept making it. Well...yes and no.
The Ramones didn't evolve from album to album as radically as The Clash, but they certainly improved as songwriters and musicians and the production value generally improved as well. They kept the songs fairly simple, straightforward, and short-occasionally adding synths or horns or strings, but at heart, it was always "1-2-3-4!" and go! They always took great 60s pop and played it with the speed and tone of a buzz saw, throwing in a few pretty ballads along the way. To me, there were albums that weren't as good as others, but there has been no Ramones studio album that I would call awful. At worst, an album like Pleasant Dreams was perhaps not as good as Subterranean Jungle. 
Other than being great innovators and inspiration for countless pop punk clones, what makes The Ramones specifically relevant Stranger With Friction? The Ramones recorded some great horror punk songs. Some even before the kings of horror punk, The Misfits. Here's a 6 song playlist of great horror moments and dark humor from 'da brudders'...

"Mama, where's your little daughter?
she's here, right here on the altar
You should never have opened that door
now you're never gonna see her no more
You don't know what I can do with this axe chop off your head
so you better relax"
"You Should Never Have Opened That Door", from Leave Home (also available as a demo on the 1st album) is about, well, you read the lyrics. That's it. A mom walks in on some sort of witchy ceremony and whoever has her daughter is going to chop off her head if she doesn't relax. Dark as hell stuff in a super catchy song. Think of The Misfits' "Last Caress", what a sick song, but you'll never get it out of your head!

"Oh, oh, oh
Sitting here with nothin' to do
Sitting here thinkin' only of you
But you'll never get out of there
She'll never get out of there.
Texas chain saw massacre
They took my baby away from me
But she'll never get out of there
She'll never get out of there
I don't care, wohoho
When I saw her on the corner
She told me told me told me told me
She wouldn't go far
Ooh, now I know I'm so much in love
'Cause she's the only girl that I'm ever thinking of"
"Chainsaw" kicks off with screeching sound of a bandsaw, whatever, before launching into such a "Ramones" kind of love song, full of longing trumped by apathy. It's such a funny little tribute to one of the most horrifying films ever made, Texas Chainsaw Massacre. 

"Psycho therapy, psycho therapy, psycho therapy
That's what they want to give me
Psycho therapy, psycho therapy, psycho therapy
What they want to give me
I'm a teenage schizoid, the one your parent despise
Psycho therapy, now I got glowing eyes
I'm a teenage schizoid, pranks and muggings are fun
Psycho therapy, gonna kill someone
Psycho therapy, psycho therapy
Psycho therapy, psycho therapy, psycho therapy
Psycho therapy, psycho therapy, psycho therapy
I like takin' tuinal, it keeps me edgy and mean
I'm a teenage schizoid, I'm a teenage dope fiend
I'm a kid in the nuthouse, I'm a kid in the psycho zone
Psycho therapy, I'm gonna burglarize your home
Psycho therapy, psycho therapy, hey
Psycho therapy, psycho therapy, psycho therapy
Psycho therapy, psycho therapy, psycho therapy
Psycho therapy, psycho therapy, psycho therapy
Psycho therapy, psycho therapy, psycho therapy"
No, not specifically horrific, but considering how often mental illness plays into horror movies, "Psycho Therapy" fits right in.

"Everybody said so man you could see it on T.V.
They stood there ashamed with nowhere to go
Nobody wants them now the kids are alright
Every day is a holiday and pushin' people around
I'm making monsters for my friends
I'm making monsters for my friends
Someone caught one I could see so myself
I had to call 254 so they wouldn't blame me
We wanted to know how much trouble there was
When we asked our daddy he said it's just because
I'm making monsters for my friends
I'm making monsters for my friends
I don't wanna open a can of worms and
I don't want any Spagetti-Os
And I could always tell when
someone is holding a grudge
I'm making monsters for my friends
I'm making monsters for my friends
I'm making monsters for my friends
I'm making monsters for my friends"
I can barely make heads or tails of these lyrics, but it's got MONSTER in the chorus and so it goes on the list. Great song from The Ramones last album, Adios Amigos. 

"Hey, daddy-o
I don't want to go down to the basement
There's somethin' down there
I don't want to go
Hey, Romeo
There's somethin' down there
I don't want to go down to the basement"
Pretty typical of the debut album, short set of catchy lyrics repeated for about two minutes. It speaks directly to that kid in all of us who didn't want to go down into that dark, lonely basement with all the spiderwebs and shadows. Here's a cool fan made video to go along with it.


"Under the arc of a weather stain boards
Ancient goblins, and warlords
Come out of the ground, not making a sound
The smell of death is all around
And the night when the cold wind blows, no one cares, nobody knows
I don't want to be buried in a Pet Sematary
I don't want to live my life again
Follow Victor to the sacred place
This ain't a dream, I can't escape
Molars and fangs, the clicking of bones
Spirits moaning among the tombstones
And the night, when the moon is bright
Someone cries, something ain't right
I don't want to be buried in a Pet Sematary
I don't want to live my life again
The moon is full, the air is still
All of a sudden I feel a chill
Victor is grinning, flesh rotting away
Skeletons dance, I curse this day
And the night when the wolves cry out
Listen close and you can hear me shout
I don't want to be buried in a Pet Sematary
I don't want to live my life again
Oh no, oh no
I don't want to live my life again, oh no, oh oh
I don't want to live my life again, oh no, no, no"
There was a great synergy to The Ramones writing "Pet Sematary" for the film adaptation of the great Stephen King novel, since King references The Ramones in the book. This is certainly one of their top 20 songs of their career. 

If anything I hope you're inspired to dig deep into The Ramones' catalogue. There are several great tracks just as good as "Blitzkrieg Bop" or "I Wanna Be Sedated". And don't forget, if you're not in it, you're out of it! 





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